29 is feelin' just fine.

Reflecting on my 29 years and sitting in the reality of this years events. Today I am so lucky. Today I was also a jerk to Cooper. I want to be completely changed by the severity of my situation/diagnosis. But I seem to slip back into the minutia from time to time.

I keep thinking that in this year and every year going forward I want to focus on what is really important. I want to not try to overstretch myself in so many directions that I am spread thin. But focus on the key factors that make myself and those around me happy. Be a good Mom. Be a good partner. Be a good friend. Those three things are the most important to me. Those are the things that lose meaning when I become too OCD about other worldly things.

Today I met up with Shannon and her friend Brad to help cheer for the walkers of the 3 day walk for Breast Cancer. Thousands of people collect at least $2,200 a peice to walk 6o miles in 3 days. All of this money goes to breast cancer research. Millions of dollars are raised across the country. This is an outstanding display of human compassion and dedication. So Sophia & I brought juice, popsicles, candy, stickers & bubbles to give to the walkers. My appreciation for them is immense. Many of whom have been affected by this disease. Many of whom have lost loved ones and now walk in their memory. I will most definitely be walking next year.

I am a person who needs purpose and also who needs to focus on what is important daily. Because I am too all over the place otherwise. In addition I need to remember what is not important and just let it go. It is cyclical otherwise and not healthy.

No more appologies, I just have to change. So year 29 will be about me changing how I see the world and how I respond to those around me. I cannot expect anyone else to make this change for me. No more excuses. No more laziness. Be the change you want to see...and I will.